Trina is off to another state for the next couple of weeks. Ryan is dealing with stuff at home, and with finances the way they are, Susan is home this weekend. Which means that the two of us are home this weekend, with nothing going on. No visitors, no babysitting, no dancing, just us.
We should probably be doing...something? But for the last few weeks Susan has projected a very "blah" image at me. Both of us have had to deal with minor illnesses, she's had a couple of migraines (and has one now, as a matter of fact), and we've both been tired early.
I think I'm starting to realize that I feed off of whatever's going on around me more than I thought. You know how some people say that they reflect the energy of those around them? I'm somewhat the same, though that only applies to those I've let in my life. I also do the same thing with books, too. If I'm reading something fairly morbid or depressing (such as Robin Hobb's books...man she tortures the living hell out of her characters!), I tend to be very dark and thoughtful. If I'm in a non-social mood, a friend who wants to do something will usually be able to convince me to do something. But there lies a problem...there's almost no one I interact anymore that I can call a friend, and I really, really don't know how the hell to make them anymore.
I keep people at a distance at work...I see them enough anyways, and it really doesn't pay to be friends with people you may have to give orders to or receive orders from. I'm relatively new to my area (three years or so), and while that may seem like more than enough time to get entrenched, for someone like me who just doesn't meet anyone except cashiers at stores, it's no time at all. So how the hell does someone who's generally anti-social meet people who can help them be anti-social? I really hate that catch-22 sometimes.
Luckily, the next couple of weeks should provide some measure of sociability. Next week is a game night put on by someone on FetLife...only one of us can go, and I offered to watch the kids so Susan could get a chance to get out some as well. Kinky people, yes, but in a vanilla-ish setting, so she said yes. She's susceptible to changing her mind though, so I might end up going to the event after all.
I discovered that there's a dungeon far more local than the nearest big city, which is a couple of hours away. They're having a two-night event...an open house followed by an actual play party, and Susan has given me the okay to attend that...as long as I give her all the details when I get home! I'm somewhat leery of going. While I'm far more interested in BDSM than I have ever been, I'm still one of those people for whom it's a bedroom activity, and not the only possible one, rather than a near 24-7 lifestyle. For my area, that seems to be the people who show up to both poly and kink events, from all I gather. We'll see.
Finally, I actually got my first response from a potential match on OKC for the first time in months. It was someone who I'd seen visit me, so I knew she got the message...and then no response. Days later, she finally replied with something on the order of "I'm not looking for friends right now, and I'm probably too slutty for your comfort as far as STIs are concerned." If she's saying that, probably...though that is what protection is for, but at least I know why I'm being rejected for once. It's kind of a refreshing feeling, really.
We should probably be doing...something? But for the last few weeks Susan has projected a very "blah" image at me. Both of us have had to deal with minor illnesses, she's had a couple of migraines (and has one now, as a matter of fact), and we've both been tired early.
I think I'm starting to realize that I feed off of whatever's going on around me more than I thought. You know how some people say that they reflect the energy of those around them? I'm somewhat the same, though that only applies to those I've let in my life. I also do the same thing with books, too. If I'm reading something fairly morbid or depressing (such as Robin Hobb's books...man she tortures the living hell out of her characters!), I tend to be very dark and thoughtful. If I'm in a non-social mood, a friend who wants to do something will usually be able to convince me to do something. But there lies a problem...there's almost no one I interact anymore that I can call a friend, and I really, really don't know how the hell to make them anymore.
I keep people at a distance at work...I see them enough anyways, and it really doesn't pay to be friends with people you may have to give orders to or receive orders from. I'm relatively new to my area (three years or so), and while that may seem like more than enough time to get entrenched, for someone like me who just doesn't meet anyone except cashiers at stores, it's no time at all. So how the hell does someone who's generally anti-social meet people who can help them be anti-social? I really hate that catch-22 sometimes.
Luckily, the next couple of weeks should provide some measure of sociability. Next week is a game night put on by someone on FetLife...only one of us can go, and I offered to watch the kids so Susan could get a chance to get out some as well. Kinky people, yes, but in a vanilla-ish setting, so she said yes. She's susceptible to changing her mind though, so I might end up going to the event after all.
I discovered that there's a dungeon far more local than the nearest big city, which is a couple of hours away. They're having a two-night event...an open house followed by an actual play party, and Susan has given me the okay to attend that...as long as I give her all the details when I get home! I'm somewhat leery of going. While I'm far more interested in BDSM than I have ever been, I'm still one of those people for whom it's a bedroom activity, and not the only possible one, rather than a near 24-7 lifestyle. For my area, that seems to be the people who show up to both poly and kink events, from all I gather. We'll see.
Finally, I actually got my first response from a potential match on OKC for the first time in months. It was someone who I'd seen visit me, so I knew she got the message...and then no response. Days later, she finally replied with something on the order of "I'm not looking for friends right now, and I'm probably too slutty for your comfort as far as STIs are concerned." If she's saying that, probably...though that is what protection is for, but at least I know why I'm being rejected for once. It's kind of a refreshing feeling, really.
